Burnley refuse to throw in the white towel after sickening 6-1 defeat

A thumbing swing from Adebayor, a neat hook inside the post by Bellamy, and a jab from Tevez. Ding-ding-ding. With little over 6 minutes on the clock, or the equivalent of two rounds of boxing, Manchester City managed to pulverize Burnley, in what was more like a towering heavy weight vs a whimpering feather weight than a Premier League match.

Carry on reading >>

Drop on the Tyne

Alan Shearer's search for a remedy to the poison chalice that is the Managerial hot seat at Newcastle United, comes to a fruitless end, and with it the Magpies 16 year love affair with the Premier League.

Since their Promotion from the then Division 1, in 1993 Newcastle United have served up some priceless moments, such as Kevin Keegan's "I'd love it if we beat them rant" rant, Faustino Asprilla's rubber legs and his hattrick in the Champions League -yes Champions League! Its these kinds of moments over the years that have made Newcastle, many supporters, including myself, their second team. Being a Liverpool supporter, I will certainly miss the clashes with Newcastle, that so often produced a goal feast.

Despite all the sentimental values and moments of nostalgia from the past, at Villa Park today, and like so often over the course of the season, Newcastle fell woefully short of the standard needed to ply your trade in the Premier League, and what could be deemed an insult, even the Championship.

Watching the game, it was no surprise that Newcastle would end up being condemned to relegation, via a hugely unfortunate deflection that saw Damien Duff gifted with the misfortune of an own goal. When your battling away in the drop zone, bad luck has a tendency to follow you like a bad smell, literally rubbing your nose in it.

Quite how a club as large as Newcastle, that possess many experienced Premier League players even managed to get themselves embezzled in a relegation battle is astounding, and can only be attributed to the managerial merry go round that has seen no less than four managers at the helm of St James'. Of course, many questions will be posed to the commitment and desire of certain players at the club, but as we have seen in the past time and time again, managerial uncertainty so often fuels the descent, from previous lofty heights. I'm sure many Geordie's would disagree, but would Newcastle be in this predicament had they not fired Sam Allardyce? Allardyce may have been responsible for Newcastle's dismal start, but I think had he been given more time, he would have dug Newcastle out of trouble, albeit in the most ugly of agricultural fashions.

Prior to the anticipated mass exodus of players from St Jame's, as Newcastle begin to prepare for life in England's second tier, a decision will have to be made on the immediate and long term future of interim manager, Alan Shearer. His managerial career may have started with the unsightly stain of relegation being marked on his CV, but this could be a blessing in disguise for at least Shearer, if not Newcastle as a whole. Nobody wants to be relegated, but this will force Newcastle, if not only for financial reason, to restructure and rid some of the dead wood that has rotted in its old age.

Over the last year, more than fog has descended over Newcastle, and at times I would have rather have watched Gazza's one hit singing wonder, Fog on the Tyne, than some of the football Newcastle have offered. I hope for Newcastle sake, home town legend Alan Shearer is given a permanent contact at St James, where he can offer them some stability, before any temptations of a music career are explored.

Shearer's Poison Chalice

Making bold predictions always seems to leave you prone to the pundits curse, case in point, see my glowing review of Aston Villa "Breaking the Mold", which coincided with a dismal run of 6 games without a win for Martin O'neill's team.

So, despite the curse crippling my literary confidence, I think Alan Shearer's return to Newcastle as manger was not only prematurely timed, but will leave the Toon army scrapping in the Championship next season. However, this is one prediction that I will be happy to see proved wrong, come the end of May when the Premier League issues next season passes.

At some point, it was inevitable that Alan Shearer would return to St James's Park as Manager much to the delight of his adoring fans. Every time Newcastle dispose of a Manger, which if we are honest happens on a regular basis, Shearer's name crops up almost as frequently as the famous one handed goal salute we were all so a custom to seeing.

In the past when ever these rumours of a return of the Newcastle legend began to circulate, they were usually met with denial from Shearer, stating a lack of experience and it not being the right time. Maybe Shearer just wanted to wait until the most difficult challenge came up, before he started swigging from the poison chalice. Should his interim appointment prove successful, it will have to rank with the greatest personal achievements Shearer has to date.

Prior to Newcastle's crunch game with Stoke, significant interest was given to Michael Owen starting the match. Shearer revealed that Newcastle's strikers could not feed on scraps, an eating disorder he was all to eager to avoid in his playing days. However, it is the defensive fragility's that have left Newcastle hungry and in the drop zone, which need the most of his attention. Concentrating on the inclusion of a nearly fit Owen, I assume was a topic he naturally found familiarity in.

Unfortunately for Newcastle, it took only 30 minutes at the noisy Britannia Stadium, for their defense to be exposed once again, after a corner left former Newcastle player Abdoulaye Faye, wide open to head home for the potters. The man assigned to mark Faye? Newcastle striker, Shola Ameobi. Even if you are a striker by nature, anyone can see the criminal amount of space Faye was left to stroll in to and nod home, would have the defensive coaching staff exchanging guilty looks, and no feasible explanation.

Shearers coaching staff, which consists of Colin Calderwood, Iain Dowie and former caretaker manager Chris Hughton all adorned with an ear piece and microphone headset, closely resembled a make shift Take That tribute band, that have all the gear and no idea. Shearer will obviously need all the experience and support he can get, but his backroom staff will need to be whispering defensive solutions, and tactics which are not as one dimensional as long ball, hit and hopes to 5ft 8in Michael Owen- not "Relight my Fire" lyrics.

To give credit to Shearer, he did drop defender Coloccini, in favour of Canadian David Edgar, and in the second half, Newcastle slowly began to chip away at the vulnerable 1-nil lead, Stoke were protecting. And, Shearer later demonstrated signs of tactical astuteness when he brought on substitute Andy Carroll. A powerful centre forward in a similar mold as Shearer himself, repaid his managers faith with a superb looping header, to salvage a crucial point for the traveling Geordies . Shearer wanted 3 points, a tall order given that Stoke have won 8 of their home games, a feat only bettered by the big four, but a single point is a welcome consolation, give the devastating consequences a defeat would have brought.

Shearer's appointment has been a great PR exercise, and has no doubt given a much needed moral boast to fans and players alike. His managerial skills will be put to the test over the next few weeks, and maybe he will use the time to prove the errors in my judgment, and justify that this was the best time to jump in to the hot seat. If he manages to keep Newcastle in the Premier League, he will once again been hailed as the home town hero, and if he fails who would hold a grudge against him, as much of the damaged was done long before his arrival. Either way his legendary status will be left untainted, and Joe Kinnear's hospital discharge, left pending.

Stoke City v Newcastle
by Doleymai

Sheffield United's Hypothetical Compensation

After two years of legal rambling, finally, at long last and when I had almost forgotten about the whole event, a line can be drawn under the Sheffield United-Tevez saga. Both West Ham and Sheffield United have settled on terms, that will see £15m heading north to the Blades, in separate payments over the next five years.

I do not blame Sheffield United for feeling cheated, and their pursuit of financial compensation for being relegated is understandable, given how much money is virtually guaranteed from either being promoted or simply staying in the Premiership today. Clubs plan their finances based on the on the lush land that the premiership will yield, and more often than not, clubs gamble too much on the fact that they will be in the top flight the following season. In what used to be a well run Premier League Club, Charlton Athletic, is now propping up the foot of the Championship table.

Sheffield United's grievances stem from the third party ownership of Argentine pair Carlos Tevez and Javier Mascherano. Still to this day, I am in a state of disbelief that West Ham even managed to sign the two of them. Given the relatively small amount of time the pair spent at Upton Park, and especially in the case of Mascherano, maybe the audacious transfer coup was a figment of my imagination, justifying my disbelief. Could my imagination be the same reason why Robinho is now trotting around The City of Manchester Stadium?

For a moment I will accept that Tevez and Mascherano did sign for West Ham. The Tevez goal against United at Old Trafford, providing adequate evidence to quash any grounds of reasonable doubt. At the time of their transfers, West Ham were gearing up for their second season back in the top flight and were looking to build on a solid previous campaign. Both of the players had been out of action for a long period of time and were going through the easy transition of life in Brazil to life in East London. In short, swapping Caipirinha's for mugs of tea.

Due to the enormous amount of talent the pair both possessed, and despite the obvious lack of fitness, they were thrown in to a team and expected to work their magic instantly. Unfortunately for West Ham, this was not to be the case, the team didn't gel, and they found themselves battling it out at the wrong of the table before the season had barely got under way.

The grounds of which the whole epic Sheffield United-Tevez saga is based on is a hypothetical scenario. The argument being, had Tevez not been allowed to play for the Hammers, which legally should have been the case, he would not have been on the pitch, playing such an instrumental part of West Ham's Premiership survival.

However, you can also argue, hypothetically, had the pair not been allowed to play at the start of the season, West Ham's form may have been vastly different. The disruption to the team could have been avoided, and West Ham might not have even been involved in a relegation battle in the first place.

Sheffield United's relegation at the end of the 2006-07 season, and subsequent legal battle with West Ham detract from the obvious fact that each team is responsible for its own performance. Liverpool, who make a habit of under performing against newly promoted sides each season, (Bradford away springs to mind) drew with Sheffield United on the opening day. Liverpool were 1-nil down, until they were granted a penalty, which if my memory serves me correctly, was taken and converted by Robbie Fowler. Those 2 points dropped by Sheffield United would have been enough to clinch the elusive 40 point standard target for premiership survival, come the end of the season. Hypothetically speaking, of course.

Despite the financial troubles already looming over West Ham and their Icelandic Chairman, settling on the £15m compensation will now allow them to bring an end to off field distractions, and will refocus their attention to matters on field.

Sheffield United, who will never know the true cost of relegation that season, will at least get a timely cash injection as they push for promotion back to the Premier League.

Whether you agree with the compensation package or not, what can not be argued is that the whole saga will have done little to build relations between the two clubs. And, with the possibility of the two clubs meeting next season, should Sheffield United gain promotion, as a neutral I am genuinely excited about a fixture, I would once have paid little attention to. Bring on the happy reunion.